The Evil eye.

My parents are very happy for me. They are happy that I have found a perfect life partner in Akash. However, whenever they talk about how happy they are for me, their happiness is always accompanied with a looming shadow of fear. My mom always ends up saying "nazar na lage" She is always scared of expressing her happiness in front of others. She fears the "boori nazar". It is like an invisible ghost, that always checks her happiness and reminds her that sorrow may just be waiting around the corner, and if she is too lost in her happiness, she may drop her guards against it...thus inviting trouble.
In India, the new born are adorned with a distinct round mark of "kajal" on the forehead, to ward off the evil eye.
Shop-owners do not fail to hang a few green chillies/red chillies and lemons right in front of their shop to protect their business against any envious glances from other shop owners.
If a child is feeling a little unwell after a school function where she performed well on the stage, the parents are likely to first use prayers or other special procedures to rid her of evil/envious glances she may have attracted, than consider medicines.
Pregnant women are very cautiously guarded against the evil/envious  thoughts of other childless women.
Whatever is considered precious, and may attract envious thoughts by others, is protected. Children, newly weds, new construction, wealth, youth, beauty, new car,...anything.
And if anything does go wrong, the evil eye is the prime suspect.
Evil eye, "buri nazar" ...is held responsible for many illnesses, misfortunes, bad luck. Then there are talismans, chants, beads, and many more such ways to fight the evil energy.
The fact that this belief has been present in different forms all across different civilizations, cultures, religions, makes it difficult to ignore it.
In Greece, a test is performed by placing one drop of olive oil in a glass of holy water. If the drop floats, the test concludes there is no evil eye involved. If the drop sinks, then it is asserted that the evil eye is cast indeed. The Greek accepted the traditional belief in the evil eye but attributed it to the Devil and envy.
The Romans and their cultural descendants in the Mediterranean nations, fortified themselves with charms to avoid the eye.
Judaism says an evil eye is worse than a bad friend, a bad neighbor, or an evil heart. Judaism believes that -  'a "good eye" designates an attitude of good will and kindness towards others. Someone who has this attitude in life will rejoice when his fellow man prospers; he will wish everyone well. An "evil eye" denotes the opposite attitude. A man with "an evil eye" will not only feel no joy but experience actual distress when others prosper, and will rejoice when others suffer. A person of this character represents a great danger to our moral purity.'
Among Muslims, if a compliment is to be made, you are always supposed to say "Masha'Allah" ( It is as God has willed) to ward off the evil eye or "Chashmi bad dur" ("May the evil eye be far").
Every religion, faith has a name for it. It is feared by all.
I find the understanding of the "evil eye" in Judaism very interesting.
My take on the concept of "evil eye" -
Thoughts, Feelings, are very strong forms of energies.  And if it is to be believed that everything is energy, everything around us is nothing but a play of different energies, then, the negative energies cannot be ignored, and can be held responsible for mis-haps, and thus one needs protection against it.
Hatred, jealousy, envy are very strong feelings.
When a mother believes that her child has been a victim of the evil eye, there are two things,
The child could be the object of envy for someone. Or, her mother is simply being fearful. In either case, there is negativity. She believes so....her belief in itself is a strong form of energy(negative), and something needs to be done about it, whether the child is actually a victim of the evil eye or not.
Any talisman, prayer or chant or whatever she believes will ward off the evil, will work. If there has been any negative thoughts around the child, her belief in the prayer, is a strong positive energy that will combat the evil eye. Even if there is no evil eye, her faith in her prayers will surely cure her of the negativity of her fear. And thus protect the child from any negativity around her, generating from the evil eye or from the fear of the evil eye.
So, essentially it is the positive thoughts which overcome the negativity, if any. There has been a lot written and said about the power of positive thinking. Faith, is positive thinking. Vehicles of faith, like talismans, prayers, chants, beads, symbols etc .... are just that, vehicles of faith, or positive energy. If I believe the scary mask will keep away evil from my house, it will.....

Jonathan Livingston Seagull a story by Richard Bach

 

This is one of those books I can read again and again....and enjoy it even more, every time.....

Extracts from the book -

Jonathan Seagull discovered that boredom and fear and anger are the reasons that a gull's life is so short, and with these gone from his thought, he lived a long fine life indeed.

We choose our next world through what we learn in this one.

".....Because any number is  a limit, and perfection doesn't have limits...."

"To fly as fast as thought, to anywhere that is," he said, "you must begin by knowing that you have already arrived..."

The trick according to Chiang, was for Jonathan to stop seeing himself as trapped inside a limited body that had a forty-two-inch wingspan and performance that could be plotted on a chart. The trick was to know that his true nature lived, as perfect as an unwritten number, everywhere at once across space and time.

"Jonathan...keep working on love"

"...and in the middle of here and now, don't you think that we might see each other one or twice?"

Don't believe what your eyes are telling you. All they show is limitation. Look with your understanding, find out what you already know, and you'll see the way to fly."

'unlimited idea of freedom'.

Fantasies....

the dictionary meaning of Fantasies is - " imagination, esp. when extravagant and unrestrained."

Imagination - I get that. So I assume these imaginations are borne out of desires....one imagines what one desires, and does not have.

"when extravagant" - So there has to be some standard by which some things are extravagant, and some are not. And these standards can be relative.

"unrestrained" - what are the restrictions? Restrictions on imagination? Restrictions on desires? These are probably the standards set by the society, or ourselves, about what is acceptable and what is not, what is right and what is not. What can we desire and what we SHOULD not desire, what we CAN have...and how much of it etc etc.

So, as I see it, there is a lot of difference between "wishes/desires" and " fantasies". So desires are your legitimate wishes...ones that you are allowed to really fulfill, and fantasies are those desires, which you can only desire..and should not really fulfill...how much ever badly you may want them. And sometimes, it even bad to want them !

I don't know if this difference that exists..is a good thing or a bad thing. I guess a little bit of both.

In my mind, I have two folders, one of wishes, desires...which I wish come true...and its very possible that they may....and nothing wrong with them.

Then there is the "fantasies" folder....these are desires...that I may want to fulfill...but don't have the courage to do so..because they are not in accordance with the "shoulds" and "cans" set by my mind. Sometimes, life moves one of those files from the fantasies folder, to the Wishes folder....and I think...maybe, just maybe, its not too bad to wish for this...and maybe it may even come true....and it may be a nice thing to happen. And some desires, burried under the WISE and RIGHT thinking, just remain there....as fantasies..

An evening walk.

I look forward to my everyday walks. Our apartment is near the harbor - a part of the Atlantic Ocean. There is a board walk near the harbor. One can see boats, ships, yachts, swans, ducks and different types of sea-birds . There are trees, there are clouds, there is the Ocean, there are benches to sit on and enjoy the view, there is also a tiny beach....and it all makes a very picturesque scene.

Mostly, the evenings are rather cold and windy. Lots of people come out with their dogs or children. Here, people always greet each other with a smile, a "Hi", or a "How are you?", or a "Have a good one"...but its strange how these strangers still remain strangers. Nobody seems to have the time to even want to get to know another person.

I like to see their pets. They seem to care a lot for them. Some dogs have hair right above their ears tied neatly in ribbons...like little girls. Some have funky hair styles, or hair streaked purple or red . I saw one even wearing a jacket. Cute. Nice. But we Indians are not used to pampering animals so much. Or should I say ... humanizing animals so much. I like pets. I like dogs. And someday, I would like to have a pet dog, or maybe some fishes. But, I don't see myself tying ribbons to their hair, and spending crazily or their hair-dos. Come on, there are children who don't have clothes to wear. Or forget the homeless, who would spend any amount of money and time on taking a pet to a pet-salon, to get its hair colored? I would play with my dog, take it out for walks...sure....even train it to do stuff like fetch the newspaper, etc etc. But ribbons? No way. Dogs are dogs..I would rather let them be that way....they are nice that way.

I take my i-pod along with me and occasionally my camera too. Yesterday I took some leftover bread crumbs, to feed the swans and ducks. It was fun. As soon as I threw the first crumb in the water, several swans and ducks came swimming hurriedly from no-where. I tried to make sure each one of them got atleast a few crumbs. Then I noticed at a distance, one small duck, its neck was bright green and wings were gray, it looked slightly smaller than the others. It did not come close for the crumbs. It was swimming hesitantly in our direction, changing its mind every other second... once hurriedly swimming away and then back in our direction, and then away again.

It finally came a little close. I had stopped dropping the crumbs and was engrossed in this little duck's journey towards us. The other bigger ducks and swans, realizing that the crumbs and stopped coming, were expectantly but calmly staring at me. But I wanted to save my last piece of bread for the little duck. These bigger guys had had their share. And then, as if following my gaze, one big white swan, turned towards the little duck. The little one hurriedly swam away. So that was it..these bigger guys were bullying the little one. Poor him. I suddenly felt a little let down. Weren't swans supposed to be the symbol of Love, grace and beauty? Imagine a swan bullying a little duck? Not nice. I decided to reserve the rest of the bread for the little one. I walked along the board walk for a while. The gathering of other swans and ducks dispersed in different directions. I kept an eye on the little one. As if it had understood my intentions, it kept up with me. It remained in my sight. We spent the next 15 minutes walking/swimming. And then when the time was just right, it swam under the bridge, to another side of the waters...where there were no other ducks as the water was very very shallow. I quickly dropped the rest of the crumbs one by one...and it excitedly gobbled up each one of them.

My little mission accomplished, it was time to go home. :-)

In case anyone is curious, in the above post, "here" refers to Stamford, CT, USA. "They" refer to the local people here.